"Like Pouring Concrete down a HOLY WELL"

 Keep running in circles... story of my life!  I always end up in my GD hometown in Illinois.  Nothing ever goes right!  I don't want to go anywhere for a long time.  I'm tired of all the running around.. it gets me nowhere, just wastes a lot of money.  Sometimes we look too far for the answers without realizing they're right in front of us.  

I spent the last two days camping in the forests of Southern Illinois.  Not much fun for me.  The last night my pills made me sick.  I spent the whole night vomiting.  Those pills do that to me from time to time.  I want off of them.. ALL OF THEM.  I saw a scene in Pawn Sacrifice (The Bobby Fischer movie) where one of Fischer's team members mentioned Bobby taking a pill.. the other responded that that would be like pooring concrete down a Holy well, yes the priest said that to I believe the attorney.  Bobby was weird.  I'm weird.  Bobby would have never taken any psychiatric medications.  I did.  BIG mistake.  My body is addicted to them now.

 I'm getting older, I see many and many things come and go.  When I log into chess servers like FICS and ICC, I am reminded of all the people I used to talk to on there many years ago.  Some of them died, some gave up the game.  Some... who knows???  Those chat rooms were great.  I talked to a lot of people on there regularly.  Only a couple now that I knew since wayyyy back in the day.  Good times.  

 I'm exhausted.. can't think of much to write right now.  I still watch online for upcoming tournaments from the United States Chess Federation.  They are all still getting canceled because of the current pandemic.  USCF has a new online rating feature.  All the tournaments are going online.  I don't care to get an online rating... it's just not the same.  

I'm just waiting for things to move on...

 There will be another day!

 thanks for reading 

- Lizzi